Trubies, I'm writing this week's review in a sugar coma. I've been celebrating my friend's birthday all afternoon with too much food and a few cocktails. Now, I'm trying to wrap my brain around what's going down in Crazy Town, but my eyes are half- open during evey other scene but shirtless Eric. If nothing is coherent in this review, then just read HBO's synopsis or watch the recap.

Let's start with the plot line that had me shouting, "WHY WON'T YOU JUST DIE?" at my tellie for the first couple minutes of the show: welcome to the hot mess that is the Mickens family, a.k.a. Sam's relatives. Joe Lee is strangling Tommy, who decides to play dead, tricks both his parents into believing he's out cold, then murders both of them while aiming only for Joe Lee. Why should we care about this scenario? Not because we never have to watch Joe Lee sit around in his knee brace again, even though that's a bonus, but because Tommy's going to end up something that was mentioned earlier this season that we haven't seen on this show yet. Say it... out loud... SKINWALKER. Tommy takes the bodies to his big brother, since he has no clue how to clean up a crime scene, much less get rid of two bodies. They end up tossing the bodies in a swam, as Sam baits gators with a handful of marshmallows. Heck of a trick to have up your sleeve, Sam. I like it.

Next, let's discuss Pam's face, or lack thereof. Marnie has no idea how she cast the spells on both Pam and her maker; even worse, she no idea how to reverse them. This really upsets me. I need Pam's face back to normal STAT. Eric can stay the way he is, tho-- shirtless and sweet.

Since we're on the Wiccan subject, let's recap what we learned this week: the spirit that is inhibiting Marnie is a Medieval witch that was captured and held captive by the Catholic Church, whom had several vampire priests that fed and killed captured witches. Since her burning stake death was vamp-induced, she has a chip on her shoulder, and is now using Marnie to get back at them.

Lafayette and Jesus decide that Marnie isn't going to be of much help in getting both Eric and Pam back to normal, so they pack up their van and head to Mexico to visit Jesus' grandfather, a true brujo or sorcerer. Good thing Lafayette packed several suitcases-- once they arrive, g-pa says he's been expecting them. Whatever he says, don't drink the water, Lala!

Finally, Sookie goes to Marnie for a palm reading so she can figure out how to help Eric, and what do you know, she gets a message from G-ma Stackhouse! What does she say? Run, Sookie, run! And Sookie, being a good Southern girl that she is, does what her grandma tells her, leaving a confursed Marnie sitting there, wondering why a ghost would tell her she is a danger to others. Bill's mole, Katerina, a.k.a. bouncy-head Kate, and a whole bunch of Bill's SWAT team abduct Marnie, taking her to Bill's house to be interrogated. Bill glamors her to find out how to fix Pam's face and Eric's memory, yet even in a glamored state, Marnie can't say she knows anything. Dear Marnie, put a spell on Bill, and give Pam her face back, please. Kinda like the seed Bill planted in Portia's mind when he glamored her, telling her every time she sees him, she will have an uncontrollable urge to scream and run. Don't we all, Bill?

Anyway, Bill summons the other four sheriffs of Louisiana, and explains they are to be ware of the witch because of the fact that she can summon vamps into the daylight, as was done hundreds of years before, Pam loses her cool and yells at Bill about Eric's lost memory, which she isn't supposed to know unless she's seen Eric. She ends up having to tell him where Eric is, and Bill is out the door faster than you can say, " I hope Sookie and Eric get some privacy already."

Why? Well, Eric has a nightmare where Godric, whom he doesn't recognize as his maker, tells him to drink Sookie dry. He wakes up, goes to Sook's bed with his fangs out, but she wakes up before he does anything. They lay together, talking about his dream and Godric. Eric feels terrible about the way he has treated Sookie, which is brought to light when Tara yelled at both of them earlier in the evening. He is conflicted, and decides to leave the house so that he no longer hurts Sookie. As he's leaving, Sook runs out the door, asks Eric not to leave, and they start making out! WOOOOHOOO! I have a feeling Bill is going to ruin the moment, tho. Bummer.

As for all the other plot lines? Here's your two-sentence recaps:

Arlene, Terry, Mikey, Chucky: Tara's momma and the Rev she's now married do a song and dance routine in Terry's house to get rid of René's ghost. Arlene and Terry feel all better, but as they sleep, a book of matches lights itself on fire in their bedroom.

Jessica, Hoyt, Jason: Jason is having erotic dreams about Jessica, who btw is effing hawt in her lingerie, but can't stop imagining Hoyt in his dream, as well. So, is Jay-Jay gonna want a threesome with his hosts?

Alcide: Marcus Bozeman, packmaster of the Shreveport werewolves, pays Alcide a visit, requesting his registration with the local pack. Alcide prefers being a free agent, and refuses by politely says, "If you don't move your foot (out of the doorway,) I'll be happy to break it for you."

So, how much longer are we going to have to wait for Eric & Sookie to get it on? Well, if you've seen next week's preview, I don't think it's happening any time soon, even though first base is covered. Till next week, fangbangers...

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