...It's called a finale! Like Tara would say, "Oh mah gawd, y'all!" Season 4 finale kills off four long-running characters, including our beloved Debbie. On the bright side, we now have an even better chance of seeing Sookie and Alcide hook up next season. Let's not get ahead of ourselves, though. We all know how the books go, and it never happens there, so all I can hope for is a completely new plot line, which TB producers are pretty good at inventing.

Speaking of inventing plot lines, this finale completely surprised me. First of all, the setting is HALLOWEEN. This should tell you this episode is going to be cray-cray! Marnie, who has now taken over Lafayette's body, ties Jesus to a chair, and threatens to hurt Lala's body until he turns over his brujo powers to her. Jesus agrees, and resurrects his demon for Marnie's taking. Jesus takes a fatal knife wound to the chest in return for Lala's safety.

You know who's not safe, though? Jason's sorry puss, cuz Hoyt gives him a delish knuckle sandwich when Jason tells him about getting busy with his ex-gf. That night, while he's mending his wounds with a frozen fruit pop, Jessica shows up on Jason's doorstep dressed as a very naughty version of Red Riding Hood. Remember, it's HALLOWEEN. They have some HALLOWEEN business time, and Jessica confesses that she doesn't want a relaysh with Jason just yet. She needs to figure out who she is, and that includes being able to eat whomever she wants. Jason is okay with that, since she is "different from every other girl he's been with." Really, Jay? The only difference I see is that she's a vamp. Maybe she'll prove me wrong next season. That's if Jason stays alive long enough to fight off the new Reverend Steve Newlin-- he shows up on Jason's doorstep as a baby vamp! Cuz it's (say it with me) HALLOWEEN.

Tara finds Jesus' body, and somehow knows instantly that Marnie is inhibiting her cousin's body. What can I say, it's a cousin thing and it's HALLOWEEN. She runs to Merlotte's, and finds Sookie and Holly both conveniently in the parking lot. As the threesome rushes to save Eric and Bill, who are tied to a stake by Mafayette, the women realize they can use magic to thwart Mafayette's evil plan of killing the two vamps Sookie loves the most in the whole wide world. They conjure up friends and family ghosts to come to their rescue, since the cemetery right next door is readily available to produce such spirits. And you'll never guess who shows up to the party! Antonia and Adele Stackhouse join forces to talk some sense into Mafayette, except Marnie isn't ready to walk towards the bright light. yet So Grams takes the sitch into her hands, literally, and shoves her arm down Lala's throat to pull Marnie out once and for all. Everyone goes bug-eyed as Marnie releases Lala's body, but continues to argue with Antonia and Grams. She finally buys what Antonia is selling, and all the spirits return to the cemetery. All, except one. Later that night, Lala tries to sleep at Sookie's house, but Jesus shows up, since, you know, Lala is a medium and all. His final words are, "Dude, I'm dead, you're a medium. I'll always be with you." Season 5 recurring role, anyone?

Back to Season 1 recurring roles, Grams isn't the only one we see in this finale. Rene comes back to tell Arlene that Terry's ghosts of the past are coming around in Season 5. Weird, cuz right before Arlene gets that message from Rene, she meets a new character that shows up as Terry's long lost military buddy. And he doesn't look half as crazy as Terry. I have no idea where this could be headed, since the books don't have this plot line.

The only scene that stays true to the books is Sookie deciding to dump both Eric and Bill... right after she lets both of them suck her dry. Nope, it isn't another one of her fantasies. As soon as she finishes saving and feeding both of her loves, she tells them it's for the best that she doesn't see either of them anymore, all while both vamps are wearing the same pajamas. Sookie leaves Bill's mansion with a broken heart on HALLOWEEN. Nan shows up with three body guards after being fired/quiting the AVL and Authority. She's been ordered to show both the true death, but decides to recruit them in her revolt against the Authority. Both males see the problem with her proposition, and as she presses the matter by needling their relaysh with the telepathic, microwave-fingers waitress, Eric takes out all three guards and Bill stakes Nan... all over his beautiful suit and luxurious carpet. His final words of the season? "We are NOT fucking puppy dogs!" If you say so, Bill.

Sookie runs home, hoping Tara is still staying at her house cuz she needs her friend to comfort her. Instead, Debbie is in her kitchen with a sawed-off pointed straight at Sook's chest. Luckily, Tara is home, and as she's making her way into the kitchen, realizes she must jump in front of the gun to save her bff. The gun blast grazes Tara's head, but that only ignites Sookie's need for revenge. Or, if she's thinking like I'm thinking, she should have taken Debs out last season. Sookie jumps on top of the were, bitch-slaps her into next week, and sticks the shotgun under Debbie's chin. Of course, the whaaaaabulance makes an appearance as Debs tries to beg for mercy, but our girl Sookie ain't havin' it. She pulls the trigger, then rushes to Tara's side, hoping she can somehow save her friend by yelling out into the house, "Someone please help!" Hellooooo, why isn't she using her fae powers to heal Tara?! After all, it is HALLOWEEN.

So, Truebies, what was your favorite part of Season 4?

See y'all next June!